Spotlight on Social Value – Matthew Hardaker

In my volunteering job as a Special Constable for the Lancashire Police I witnessed first-hand people going through incredibly tough periods which affected their life and their mental health. And without a strong support network they could easily fall into a spiral of crime or care-needs or go towards a full mental health crisis. These individuals came from all walks of life; lawyers, greengrocers, mechanics, nurses and everything in between!

This stayed with me and I wanted to do something after my police volunteering. I’m a keen motorcyclist and I stumbled across Mental Health Motorbike and I thought ‘I’ll learn to be a mental health first aider… I didn’t really know what it entailed, but I was happy to give up a bit of my time and give a bit back.’

I went on a two-week course that was held in the evenings and we did everything from conventional content learning about the mind to how you should deal with someone who is going through crisis, role plays, what to do and what not to do etc. The course helped me to appreciate that people don’t necessarily want you to solve the problem for them; they want to tell you about the problem and have that realisation that it’s not just them going through this issue. Often they almost want that comfort that they’re not alone in their challenge – that we’ve all been through it.

During the course we learnt that you have to tailor your approach based on who you’re talking to because age, gender, religion and many other factors can all have an impact. There are different techniques you need to learn to draw out the conversation depending on who you are speaking to. Ultimately the course taught me how to engage people in a constructive way to encourage them to open up. And that is much easier to do that when you have a common hobby or talking point, which is why Mental Health Motorbike is such a great network and makes such an impact on people’s lives.

As mentioned previously, I think there’s gender, generation, religion, culture – many factors. Generally, I think men are less willing to share and that is a barrier. But there’s also something culturally in individuals being unsure to ask if someone else is ok. And that hesitancy means we’re not creating an opportunity to talk and share with one another.

One of the big things I learned in my policing role and my time with Mental Health Motorbike, is that everyone is the same. They might have different levels of armour and different levels of comfort in terms of speaking about their feelings, but I think everyone appreciates the question of ‘are you alright?’.

There are many:

• It’s a non-judgmental listening ear. We’re a mixture of all shapes, sizes, backgrounds, genders and ages. The individuals who reach out to us will certainly find someone who they can resonate with.
• Realisation that they aren’t on their own / that others have faced similar challenges and come out the other side. Perception is very often not the reality!
• It’s a great leveller. It makes you more comfortable with yourself and makes you more empathetic with others. I think we’re all guilty of wanting to be seen in a certain light; however we can sometimes forget that we’re all a collection of individuals who have the same thoughts, feelings and emotions.
• To the individuals we speak to, MHM doesn’t feel like you’re seeking ‘intervention’. That’s a big barrier to some and it can stop them seeking help. We want our conversations to feel like a chat with a friend. 

The biggest thing for me was realising that whilst all things are important in context, the stress and strains in life mean we can lose context very quickly and this can send people into a spiral they may not be able to control. We should appreciate that we might not do things all the same, we might approach things differently, but that we’ve got to have some empathy that we’ll all react to stages in our lives in different ways, and we’re not always in control of that. Everything is solvable with the right help and support, and everyone should be comfortable asking for help when they need it.

If you want to get involved it can be as simple as getting a sticker and putting it on your bike and saying ‘look if you want a chat, I know these people and they’ll have a conversation with you’. If someone wants to be more actively involved, they can train to become a mental health first aider and then they can determine how much availability they want to offer and how involved they want to get. The practical application of being a mental health first aider is talking to people and being available should someone want to have a direct conversation with you.

We’re all on a bit of a journey, we all go through hard times at different stages in our lives. And it’s ok to talk. We’re all humans, we all have different levels of resilience and nobody’s experience is the same. And that’s ok. Mental health affects everything in our life, and those around you, so treat it like any other health matter and seek help when you need it.